Before I make Mom extremely nervous, I would like to say that this week did end well and that I am extremely happy, okay!?!? =)
This week I gained my testimony of . . . The Atonement of Jesus Christ.
This week something was just off . . . Elder Scofield and I couldn’t really get a rhythm going this week and that was really weird because last week was so incredibly natural to work. It was like nothing went quite how we expected it to go. The people that we met all fell through really quickly this week and just didn’t want anything to do with anything. We worked a ton with Jaiane to try to Baptize her on Sunday but it just didn’t happen L
We went to another area to do two interviews and one lady was just SUPER ready to be Baptized but didn’t want to yet which was really more saddening than anything. And the other guy didn’t pass because he won’t repent yet . . . President didn’t let him be Baptized.
We met a guy when we went to that area for interviews who gave us a ride cuz it was raining like crazy and we were one hundred percent soaked . . . Turns out he served a Mission in Japan and fell away from the church . . . The dude's testimony is incredible . . . He gave up everything he had to serve a Mission but I don’t know . . . Just won’t go back to church right now. He still believes everything and knows everything but says he has things going on his life right now that he needs more time to fix . . . It was so hard for me to hear his story and know how much the Lord trusts him but he just won’t put his heart back where it needs to be . . .
Two companionships in our Zone are STRUUUUUGGLING and it’s all just a thing of pride . . . Other companionships had Baptisms that fell through because the parents didn’t let them which was . . . Crappy. Because the parents had been totally cool with everything up until that point.
Anyways, this week was the first time I ever reeeeeally truly felt PAIN for the decisions and neglect of others. It was the first time I think I started to understand what Jesus Christ went through for us. The first time I ever cried just because people refuse to accept Jesus Christ and do what they know is right. The first time I felt pain for others because I know how much better they can be . . .
I obviously don’t want to make anyone depressed. But I want everyone to know just what the Atonement means. Elder Holland said we could never understand what Jesus went through until we had felt a little bit of that pain. The Atonement, honestly, is EVERYTHING we got here. Nothing we do makes any sense or has any purpose without the Atonement. If we can’t be faithful, if we can’t fulfill our callings, if we don’t do what we know Jesus Christ expects us to do the MOMENT He expects us to do it, we are denying Him as our Savior and showing that we do not care what pain He suffered for us. But when we truly accept Jesus as the Christ, we can know with a surety that we have taken away at least a little bit of the pain He suffered. We can know that what He did for us was not in vain. And we can know that we can be happier and have a better life. So much better of a life. Better than we can imagine. But only we truly do what Christ would do if he were by our side.
I am so grateful for the Atonement. I am grateful for the difficulties I had this week and the love that my Father in Heaven has for me. So much love that He felt I was ready to improve and learn such a huge lesson. I am so glad that He loves me and trusts me and sees me as something that can be much greater.
This week my Spirit feels bigger. I feel more ready to serve. I feel stronger. Like something has changed inside of me. That I have a new purpose. To help people REALLY understand the light of Christ and what He did for them.
I love you all so so so much. I would encourage everyone to pray tonight to understand better the Atonement of Christ. It is not as simple as we always think it is. I LOVE YOU ALL!!!!
Love, Elder Dylan Miles Jensen